Snow is the "c" word...can we use that here? Let me know, makes the stories better. We get the changeover to sleet, then it's going to flash freeze at some point. So here's my friggin day...

6:30 am: I go outside to get ahead of the rain which ended up as sleet. My snowblower I got from the guy I work with for free works fine buts it's a 5 horse. So being a 5 horse I can't wait until there is a lot of snow and I need it to be not wet heavy snow. Wife comes out too. Rockstar gets up after wife yells at him. They both come out.

7:00: I hand the snowblower over to her so I can do my across the street neighbors driveway. He used to be away every storm for work. Now he retired. I was psyched because he would be around. First snow of the year...they are on fuckin vacation. His driveway is so steep, if there is snow on it, you can't hardly walk up it. It's fuckin awful.

7:05. His snowblower runs out of gas at the bottom of the driveway.

7:15: I see my wife waving me over. She apparently ran over the plastic gutter downspout extension...and she hands me the snowblower key she found in the driveway. Luckily, since the snowblower previously belonged to a ( insert someone from the border wall thread) I it was hot wired and didn't need the key. Gotta love It. But the 6 foot extension...45 minutes using my heat gun to get that out in 80 fuckin pieces. Last time she used the snowblower I was away. I came home to a non working snowblower, a pile of screws, a missing heater box and a snapped off choke knob. That was my old Toro. After this, she will never touch the snowblower again. Don't understand it..I don't break her fuckin vacuum cleaner.

8:15: Back doing the neighbors driveway and then finishing mine.

10:00: Go down to my other neighbors house because.... Like a FUCKIN idiot, i stopped the car yesterday while driving by to laugh at him for showing his tiny wife how to use a 12 hp Ariens snowblower. I find out he was going skiing for the weekend. As I approach the driveway I see a shovel in the snow and some obviously previously stuck tire marks bouncing off the fence. The shovel is now unusable because the daughters "shit for brains" boyfriend that lives in the basement came out in the morning, got stuck, put the shovel under the tires for traction ...so the shovel was black with tire rubber so the snow sticks to it. Fuckin idiot couldn't have snowblowed the driveway, or put the shovel away. If I had him there I would have cut his penis off with a pen knife from a supermarket gum ball machine.

10:10: I go in the garage and grab a shovel,to do off the stairs before I start the snowblower. Brand new snowblower. Maybe it's me...but I don't see why I'm the guy to "break cherry" on this Ariens and my across the street neighbors Husquavarna. So I fire it up and do his driveway. His wife was home...she came out to so the walk. I text the husband, told him I plowed his wife back to front.

11:00. I get back home to shovel an inch of sleet from the driveway.
11:30 I get back in the house...done. Now I have to take Nick to work at indoor golf. God fuckin forbid should someone NOT have a golf lesson in the dead of fuckin winter.

1:30. I'm home, another 2 inches of sleet. Clear the driveway and the decks.

Bummer is I was planning an afternoon of moonshine but I can't because I have to pick Nick up at 6.