PA-PLAYA
Breaking News* Tim Rosaforte is already there at the fart-sniffing laboratory close to Jupiter, FL where they have Tiger's flatulence sample.
Rich Lerner: Tim, what's going on?
TR: Well... coming off of his incredible week at Carnoustie, some of the reporters were able to capture the sweet, succulent aroma coming from his deepest cavity while sitting in the scoring trailer Sunday evening as he was signing his scorecard. But here's the thing, Rich... the bottled sample has a shelf life of 72 hours. Now I've been in touch with the scientist working at the laboratory over the past day or so and he believes that they might be able to actually get another 12 hours of preservation time, providing that the sample canister is maintained in an airtight room that stays at a constant room temperature of 60º.
So we have a small extended window of time from what we were originally told to have our best and brightest analysts get down there and study the sample. Of course - that canister had to travel from Scotland to the US, and there were initially some issues regarding customs upon arrival back here in the states. Luckily one of the customs agents, who is a huge Tiger fan, understood the time sensitivity and cleared the sample without actually opening it, which obviously would've destroyed any chance of it being analyzed.
RL: So what are they hoping to learn from Tiger's flatulence sample, Tim?
TR: Rich, these analysts are very much into body odors, routines, algorithms, etc of modern day athletes. According to the feedback I've received from talking with the lead scientist at this facility - they can also determine the stress level of athletes from the prior 24 hours of when the sample was captured. I can tell you that one of the reporters who was allowed in the scoring trailer on Sunday said that once Woods broke wind - he said it smelled like cedar. Now that is unconfirmed, of course, but if it holds true - that all bodes well for Tiger going forward. But we won't know until the official test sampling within the next day or so.
RL: If true, Tim, that all bodes well for Tiger?
TR: It certainly does, Rich. Not only will he be in contention at the PGA, he's pretty much a shoe-in for the Ryder Cup team as well. And I have spoken with Jim Furyk about this, and as you know - Jim has a fairly big snout and can detect odors from a mile away. He's also going to be part of the analytical team going down to test the sample. Since he's gonna be leading the Ryder Cup team in a few months - he felt that he needed to be a part of this process as well.
RL: So cedar is good, Tim?
TR: Yes, cedar is the odor they're hoping they detect.
RL: Thanks Tim. Tim Rosaforte, who knows everything about every player on tour, and our lead analyst here at Golf Channel. Always good to talk with you.
TR: You bet.